When a person has nothing to do, no obligations, no structure, no schedule of any kind, just waiting for an undefined deadline they become very stagnant and inactive - mentally, its like they aren’t a real person with a real life anymore.
What’s more, when you don’t do much, you have nothing to talk about. No stories involving drama and suspense. The only thing you can talk about is how bored you are or other similar yet uninteresting topics, the weather for example.
Without planning that involves a time frame there is no progress, or at least it can feel that way. Also true if the time fame is just way too big. Having small time related goals/demands help keep a mind on track. That’s why all those little obligations you have are so great!
I never thought I’d say this, but all those things that you have to do, but don’t want to, are saving your life! Favours for random relatives, work dinners, family traditions, PTA meetings (I don’t have kids, but PTA meetings are boring, right?), basically all that extra stuff outside of work and stuff you want to do. Could even include work I suppose. (As shown in the diagram below).
 |
| Obligations |
Be thankful for all those conversations that finish with “I’m sorry to leave but I have to go and ...” Unless you’re lying, they mean that you have stuff in your life, important stuff. Because let’s be honest, if it wasn’t that important you would take advantage of free will and choose not to do it.
That extra stuff shows character, depth, and human connection.
You can’t create it out of thin air either. You can’t instantly be expected to pick up some guy’s kid from after school care every Tuesday afternoon. Those obligations come from people trusting you, needing you and even loving you. From having meaningful relationships with others.
Enjoy your obligations!
That extra stuff shows character, depth, and human connection.
You can’t create it out of thin air either. You can’t instantly be expected to pick up some guy’s kid from after school care every Tuesday afternoon. Those obligations come from people trusting you, needing you and even loving you. From having meaningful relationships with others.
Enjoy your obligations!
Very true, and insightful! There are also the 'obligations' of trying to keep as fit and healthy as you can which (believe me...) can take some time! But, like all obligations, such 'tasks' also have their inherent benefit both physically and mentally. Also, obligations like learning Spanish must be chewing up a lot of time, but the payoffs are huge! Hang in there! [Miranda]
ReplyDeleteThanks Miranda! My Spanish is getting there, but you're right, it does take time. Doing the dishes is another obligation I'd rather pass on! haha!
Delete